Pete Buttigieg, Patriarchy, and Paternity Leave

Paternity leave is good for everyone and yet when we have a public example of someone doing that in the U.S., he’s criticized for “taking a vacation.” As Buttigieg pointed out to NBC News, “When somebody welcomes a new child into their family and goes on leave to take care of that child, that’s not a vacation; it’s work. It’s joyful, wonderful, fulfilling work. But it is work.”

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How Compulsive Eating is a Symptom of Patriarchy

The behavior is a patriarchal one because the person is doing what society encourages them to do – push through and pay no attention to any feeling. In doing so, the person becomes not only disconnected from themselves, but also from a Higher Power, God, Goddess, Godx, Source, etc. Those divine energies are accessed via a more feminine approach and often through the body.

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Breaking Free from the Shame Around Masturbation

Many of us are indoctrinated with shame. It seems to be a readily used societal mechanism to control and dominate when someone or something is perceived to be out of control. A place where that shows up a great deal is with sex, including solo sex, or masturbation. Shame is the instilled belief there’s something bad or wrong with you — fundamentally. It’s not the feeling that you made a mistake, but rather the feeling you are a mistake.

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The Importance of Sticking to Your “No”

A boundary is an imaginary line that separates you from another person, place, thing, activity, or process. Think of it not only in terms of separating you physically from another person, but also delineating your feelings, needs, and responsibilities from others. Boundaries also communicate how you do and don’t want others to treat you as well as what type of situation you desire being in.

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Denise Renye
The Art of Silence

There’s a great quote by the anthropologist Angeles Arrien that captures this well: "When did you start creating discomfort with the sweet territory of silence?" Silence…it doesn’t have to be uncomfortable. Silence, it can be pleasant and something we welcome. It can be something we befriend and pour tea to sit with. However, silence is not often perceived as something we can embrace.

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Listening to the Body

Sometimes bodies speak quietly, like through a whisper. And sometimes we miss that whisper and then our bodies speak more loudly, such as through a cold or an illness even. When we dis-associate from the body, the body’s inner wisdom has a way of bringing us back. Sometimes we know our bodies are speaking to us, but we don’t understand the message! It may be hard to decipher the messages from the body as they are encoded in such ways that require some quieting, slowing, or curiosity.

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Healing and the Betrayal Wound

Betrayal runs deep. And if there is a betrayal wound in one’s life that began from a young age, this may show up time and time again throughout one’s life. The breaking of a trust bond is a betrayal. There was an implicit or explicit agreement made and all parties followed this until at least one did not.

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Denise Renye
For Therapists: Working with Sex Workers

Sex workers (sworkers). They are arguably the crux of most cultures, offering a service that is uniquely intimate. They are a part of every sociocultural makeup, yet denied, sometimes as existing, and sometimes as deserving, especially as deserving basic worker rights. International Sex Workers’ Day, or International Whore’s Day, was on June 2. This day of recognition, established in 1975 by a group of French sex workers, brings attention to the inhumane working conditions for people in this profession.

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